[ Nσt just αnσthєr figurє ]

[Doshy]

»Like I don't exist«

I Miss my laptop.. it’s been my greatest friend for the past few years. My Music, Pictures, my Notes and my Desktop… I wish I never let it fall as much in college :( I’m homeless now going through the worst days, I believe. Moving from Duaa’s laptop to Abee’s and then to Mama’s which is killing me because it’s Vaio! Anyway, I’m in for a real Drama today.. Yuss yuss, my thoughts are yours to read. They’re not very pleasant I suppose. They can be real funny in a year or so :D at least to me hehe.
It took me almost 2 years to feel fine about Buffy leaving. I wonder how long it would take me to be fine now that Bird had left too. The thing is that, there’s only so much I can take… You see, as I said before and will still say until I donno how long, People are the hardest to replace. I can always change my glasses and feel fine with the new ones and live my life perfectly. As perfect as a human’s life can ever be. Well, I don’t care about my glasses.. I lose them every year it’s become a tradition to me, one that doesn’t hurt… Because they are pretty much easy to replace. I’m probably gonna stop wearing them soon but I’m not crying about it! Because they are damn glasses! Not people, Not Dear Friends!! I wish all my friends were made of plastic, In which case I would always find another that would fill right in. But my people aren’t sweet plastics… In my three worlds, My dear ones are made of different materials.. Sometimes Real. So Real… Like In Reality, My Friends are skin and bone, flesh and blood.. They are Tears and Smiles. In my Dreams, People change from lighter to darker, Clear to Faded, They’re sometimes Hearts or Souls. But in my Screen.. They become thoughts and feelings, text and faces, They’re a stupid Lie and an ugly Truth.. But there’s this thing about my worlds… They are all in one and they sometimes get mixed up. I guess all this proves how insane I am. Well, at least I know it :) even though Sad is the only emotion which gets me writing, I suppose it’s better than cursing the whole universe.
I realize that the world doesn’t stop when I want it to, neither does it end whenever I wished it would. I know for sure that my problems are nothing comparing to others. I’m just a loser who thinks too much. But sometimes my thoughts lead me to good things. Like what I gain from each experience. Knowing those people helped me a lot. Like I wouldn’t have this taste in music if it weren’t for Bird & Clowny… I wouldn’t have as much appreciation for imagination if it weren’t for Lilly. Lol as much as it hurts to admit it, she was a Great storyteller! I believed her too much. Without each of my Mortals I wouldn’t have learned that its all right to be completely Honest. Even if truth hurts me! I learned that I should not be afraid of saying or writing what I Really wanna say. Even if I thought it sounded stupid! I’m still learning from all the people I know. I’m still working on it. I will be better and Fine. I will be fine even if it meant: I never existed.
The world is still the same, People are still dying. In Kuwait, Few days ago, Captain Hussain passed away. I remember him when I was a kid living practically at Abee’s and butting in every tennis practice and him not minding me joining. I know his kids will be scarred for life.. I just hope they’d be fine in a while. In Jeddah, A child was found in a stolen car next to his school. One of his arms was cut off and he was slaughtered. He was only 6 and a half. His mother and father will be scarred for life. I hope they find the Assholes who did it. All this and the world remains the same. It would still be the same to some people, But I doubt it would be the same for those people. Allah yer7am mawtana… Ameen
Finally, this was brought out by one person. To Bird,The Musician, The Writer, and the best Friend.

“I only fear that I don’t have enough time left to tell the world that there’s no time left”
Forgive Me,

[Doshy]

·!¦[·[The times]·]¦!·

My Memories are the thoughts which control my emotions. They bring the good, They bring the bad. There’s no point of even trying to think of other things. i know everything comes back again anyways. We are born with certain flaws, Allah wrote that, and so it was :) . I know i spend every minute of my SAD times wishing i had a different Mind. I know i cannot change it. I know though.. i’ll keep trying like a fool. Because that’s just the way it is and always going to be. I will not change just because a stupid CLown didn’t want my friendship. I won’t stop letting my thoughts out just because people don’t get them sometimes… Or because i always explain them with the wrong words and wrong everything. I know that no matter what, It’s going to be the same. For me that is. I know that it’s not ending yet.. It should be soon though. It has to be!

Some people are driven by Hope. I’m alive because of my Faith..

[Doshy]

خخخخخخخخخـ ,, الله يرجني و رــبي اني هبله
صـــمغت أصاابعي بالغلط بالصمغ القوـــي و متوهقه كيف أشيلوو!!
أحس أصاابعي خششششنه و ثقيييله



يااا رب بالله كييف أشيلووو مره ينرفز و يضااايق ودي اقص أصاابعي
امممم شكلي حقعد اقرم و أعضعض فيهاا لين ما ترووح



يعنييي أشكي لنفسي عن حااالي الأهبل
هـــ'ع

Don't try this at Home

[Doshy]

Oh God,
Forgive me when I Whine

[Doshy]

Headstrong? wanted,needed

We cannot deny how silly we are sometimes. Even if we were once pointless in the past and we acknowledge it now, we’d most probably have our moments in our present and future. Believe me, i’d know.. I’m sure we all go through this. I mean for example, the simplest thing is that when we look at old pictures of us and see how different our hair due looked and how stupid we think it is now and we thank Allah 88 times that we changed it lol. Or even our style in clothes.. All those superficial things.. Let alone our thoughts and the way we thought back then. Think of how stupid we think we were for a number of things we thought in the past were the BEST. Think of how mature we believe we are in our "now". Specially when we remember our past… Imagine how silly we’d think we were when it’s 8 years after this year :) … Seriously, History does repeat itself.

I think of the way im thinking right now, that i’v never thought i’d change since 15. I actually swore to Duaa i’d still be looking, thinking, and talking all the same in some years yet here i am.. People don’t recognize me when they see me. And i’v been told i’v changed… I don’t know what to comment on that really. But you see, Abee always tells me "Everything happens for a reason" and i believe it. So, i did stupid silly things in my past to reach this conclusion right now.. That i was stupid and silly :) and that Everything changes.

There are things i always believed i was and still.. Like i never thought i was better than anyone. Probably that’s how i WANTED myself to think.. But i honestly was never honest completely with myself. Even when im alone. Even when im writing to myself. I’d always think and write the things i want myself to become. Not the things i already am. I now know that. I think i can actually know myself more now. Because i was confused with the person i want to be and the person i was all along. I wanted to become perfect. But what i really am is Flaw-full. I know how i am. I know all the things i did and thought and wrote. I knew the meaning and the reason for each word i wrote. I do think i’m better than some people… Those people who see the world as they lived it. Those people who cannot think for a second that the other person is not like them and might never be like them. Those people who do not understand really that we all have different perspectives! The people i feel sorry for, who think that the whole world is through their eyes Only. Believing that every other opinion or thought is absolutely wrong.. Just because it doesn’t match their’s. Those people who do not understand other’s differences and judge them on a scale they’v created. I hate those..

I’m not a teen anymore :) i’m not a school girl nor am i a college girl. im simply Doshy now.. without any shawa2eb hehe. well, at least i hope so. I simply Love my favorite person… The one who can tell im lying the second im telling the lie! The one who i hope knows the person i am, not the one i wanted to become…

[Doshy]

I saw a child with eyes of Blue ,, he stood and watched the others play
He didn't know what to do ,, I stoped a moment and then I said
Why don't you join the other dear? ,, he looked ahead without a word
Then I knew he couldn't hear ,,Oh god forgive me when I whine

I've been blessed indeed
The world is Mine

[Doshy]

Wish I could just stand and
SCREAM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAHH
AAAAAAAHH
AAAAAHH
AAAHH
AHH

?

[Doshy]

From those around I hear a Cry,
A muffled sob, a Hopeless sigh,
I hear their footsteps leaving slow,
And then I know my soul must Fly!
A chilly wind begins to blow,
Within my soul, from Head to Toe,
And then, Last Breath escapes my lips,
It's Time to leave. And I must Go!
So, it is True (But it's too Late)
They said: Each soul has its Given Date,
When it must leave its body's core,
And meet with its Eternal Fate.
Oh mark the words that I do say,

Who knows? Tomorrow could be your Day,
At last, it comes to Heaven or Hell
Decide which now, Do NOT delay!
Come on my brothers let us pray
Decide which now, Do NOT delay!
Oh God! Oh God! I cannot see!
My eyes are Blind! Am I still Me
Or has my soul been led astray,
And forced to pay a Priceless Fee
Alas to Dust we all return,
Some shall rejoice, while others burn,
If only I knew that before
The line grew short, and came my Turn!
And now, as beneath the sod
They lay me (with my record flawed),
They cry, not knowing I cry worse,
For, they go home, I face my God!
Oh mark the words that I do say,
Who knows, Tomorrow could be your Day,
At last, it comes to Heaven or Hell
Decide which now, Do NOT delay !
Come on my brothers let's pray
Decide which now, Do NOT delay
....

[Doshy]

الذين يشاهدون محتوى الموضوع الآن : 2 ( الأعضاء 2 والزوار 0) ‏Doshy, ‏bayan.h+

Welcome Sweet heart
حي الله من جاااني حيااكي حيااكي

يســـــعد رووحك بـــنو ,,
Hope you're enjoying your time here

[Doshy]

My Photagraphy
speaks my mind;

------------------------------------------

Just a day with friends, and some Hot
choco & marshmellows is all you need

She's my AngelMy sweet sweet angel;
يـــــا رـــب أحفظهــــــا..
My Shahooda

Grab hold of the Moon
Just like a piece of Grape