2011- 1- 25
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#15
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أكـاديـمـي ألـمـاسـي
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“HeadStrong!!”. Needed, Wanted?
Headstrong? wanted,needed
We cannot deny how silly we are sometimes. Even if we were once pointless in the past and we acknowledge it now, we’d most probably have our moments in our present and future. Believe me, i’d know.. I’m sure we all go through this. I mean for example, the simplest thing is that when we look at old pictures of us and see how different our hair due looked and how stupid we think it is now and we thank Allah 88 times that we changed it lol. Or even our style in clothes.. All those superficial things.. Let alone our thoughts and the way we thought back then. Think of how stupid we think we were for a number of things we thought in the past were the BEST. Think of how mature we believe we are in our "now". Specially when we remember our past… Imagine how silly we’d think we were when it’s 8 years after this year :) … Seriously, History does repeat itself.
I think of the way im thinking right now, that i’v never thought i’d change since 15. I actually swore to Duaa i’d still be looking, thinking, and talking all the same in some years yet here i am.. People don’t recognize me when they see me. And i’v been told i’v changed… I don’t know what to comment on that really. But you see, Abee always tells me "Everything happens for a reason" and i believe it. So, i did stupid silly things in my past to reach this conclusion right now.. That i was stupid and silly :) and that Everything changes.There are things i always believed i was and still.. Like i never thought i was better than anyone. Probably that’s how i WANTED myself to think.. But i honestly was never honest completely with myself. Even when im alone. Even when im writing to myself. I’d always think and write the things i want myself to become. Not the things i already am. I now know that. I think i can actually know myself more now. Because i was confused with the person i want to be and the person i was all along. I wanted to become perfect. But what i really am is Flaw-full. I know how i am. I know all the things i did and thought and wrote. I knew the meaning and the reason for each word i wrote. I do think i’m better than some people… Those people who see the world as they lived it. Those people who cannot think for a second that the other person is not like them and might never be like them. Those people who do not understand really that we all have different perspectives! The people i feel sorry for, who think that the whole world is through their eyes Only. Believing that every other opinion or thought is absolutely wrong.. Just because it doesn’t match their’s. Those people who do not understand other’s differences and judge them on a scale they’v created. I hate those..
I’m not a teen anymore :) i’m not a school girl nor am i a college girl. im simply Doshy now.. without any shawa2eb hehe. well, at least i hope so. I simply Love my favorite person… The one who can tell im lying the second im telling the lie! The one who i hope knows the person i am, not the one i wanted to become…
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