That is not bad; however, you need to present your proposal in the format we have discussed in the recorded lecture (lecture 1). That is to say, you need to have section for the abstracty and you then write the abstract for your proposal.
Then you move to the introduction and then write the introduction,. Then another section for the reserch question and so on and so forth.
You should have a separate section telling clearly what your research is about and so on.
Good Luck
هاذا اللي قال لي تعبت وش اللي اسويه الحين الله يفتحها علينا جمممممميع ويسهل